January 28, 2024 So, THAT is the Reason
I received a note from a friend I haven’t heard from in quite a few years. It was good hearing from him, and he brought back many memories from over 20 years ago. He asked why I had waited so long to put another blog up on PBNradio. I thought you might want to see my answer to him. His name is Tony.
Tony: I listen to podcasts a lot and was delighted when the 1-24-24 one loaded and began playing. It seems you had stopped for awhile.
Pat: Hey Tony. GREAT hearing from you. You and I have been long time friends.
Yes, there are a couple reasons I have personally been off the air for a while. We have replaced our old computers and equipment with newer equipment which will not fail as readily. We have purchased some new broadcast software to replace our 25 year old software which was beginning to fail quite a bit.
As we replaced the software, we had, and still have, a steep learning curve with this new software. I have also been hunting new artists and music to supplement the music we have. We went through a complete reorganization of our website, which makes it easier for people to access the music, the podcasts and the blogs. We brought PBNclassic and PBNpure under one Website: PBNradio.com .
I have had help in the areas in which volunteers could help. Yet, much of what had to be done, had to be done by me. The Music. The locating and use of the broadcast software. The placement of computers which make it easier for me while I’m on the air. The production of the music in order to be able to use it on the air. Then, I had help with the physical look of the Website, for which I gave my input of what I wanted. Also, the physical tearing down and moving of equipment and furniture in and out of the studio. It just all took, and takes a lot of time. We STILL aren’t finished in some areas.
Yet, I guess the biggest reason I was not making new podcasts was the need for me to understand what God wants me to do, and how He wants me to approach it and accomplish it. I really enjoy being on the air with the listeners. Yet, I really want to know that what I am doing is what God really wants me to do. I want to understand what the listeners NEED in this day and time of Earth’s history, and I need to know exactly what God wants to do through me, if I was to stay personally, on the air. I want to take me completely out of the picture, and I want to hear plainly, what God wants to do with PBNradio.com and Praise Until Dawn. If He wants me to step down and let someone else take over, I was/am willing to do that. I also became very aware of my own frailties, and my total need for dependence on God, and Him, alone, each minute, each hour of each and every day. I have NO goodness nor abilities outside of Him. If what I do is NOT of God, then I’m just batting at the air, with no purpose. I MUST understand God’s love for me, and each of us!
There are some things I believe God told me to do, that to anyone else would sound like craziness. Yet, I MUST do what I believe God has told me to do. Part of my growth is to understand that even if God has NOT told me to do these things, He will reward my determination to follow Him.
Unless the listener is listening very closely to PBN, no one will notice a difference. They still might not know if they listen very closely. Yet, I will know. I will know that God was the establisher of PBN long ago when I was an unsuspecting child of 5 years old in Springfield, MO, on through my time in College, Grad School and through today, AND, it is HE who continues to sustain PBN on a continuing basis day after day after day! My dependence MUST be on Him, with NO questions as to His motives or goodness. I am His servant. I MUST understand what that means. I can give a Webster’s Dictionary definition of servant. Yet, I need to understand what GOD wants me to understand about being a servant.
I do not know completely how I’m to do this on the air, yet I know I must continue to speak of the goodness of God. I am to speak of utter dependence on Him, without question, though people or rulers or circumstances viciously attack us. We will stand our ground and never be moved away from Him. When He seems nowhere around, we will NOT question. We KNOW where He is, for He has promised.
If these are the End of Days, we cannot be despondent and questioning God about the death of our loved ones, or our child, or our wife/husband. We grieve their passing from us, yet we do NOT question. God is NOT the one who did the killing. He did the eternal saving. Knowing THAT is enough for us. We Trust Him and Love Him. We HATE Sin and its effects.
Now, I am not a preacher, nor skilled orator, nor some eloquent thespian. I have no idea how I am going to do that on the air. Yet, my dependence MUST be on “Helper” (Holy Spirit). We STAND on God’s Words, and we will NOT be moved off them.
So much to describe what all I have been going through the past year and a half. You asked why it has been so long between podcasts. It’s been a journey, and still is. Your prayers are appreciated, T-Bar!
Much love to you and your family,
pat